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Open Window In A Closed Room Of Confusion










Have you ever felt you were meant for something greater than what you were doing, but felt trapped by your situation and lack of means to attain your greatest dream? Were you stuck in a day dream with no map, car, or key to find your way around to the golden treasure in your reality? Lost in the confusion of the world. No idea where to start, or how to even get to a starting place. Knowing what you want, but unable to reach the means to make it happen. Once upon a time you had a plan of action, and you did what was necessary, but it all fell through because you had no more support. Told over and over again what you wanted was a nice dream, but was only that, a dream. After so many times it gets beaten into you, and you begin to believe it. It's hard to want great things. It's even harder to attain the impossible when you feel so small and helpless. It's frustrating to be told, it's okay, I felt the same thing, you'll get there eventually. Though they may be right, and you will make it, if you keep pushing towards it... how are you supposed to believe them when they say "I know how that feels" or "I've been there" when every situation is so different. You can't follow their steps because their dream isn't your dream. It's nice to know you aren't the only one struggling, but knowing that doesn't always fix the problem. It takes perseverance, and strength. You have to be self motivated, and able to stay driven despite the many trials thrown your way. There are moments when you have to believe in yourself, and throw everyone else into the background. There are days when the only thing you want is someone to tell you, 'You can do this, it isn't impossible,' or 'I am so proud of you.' Because those of us who dream of the impossible know that it doesn't happen in just one day. It takes a lot of effort, and there are so many steps to climb before you even get amongst the stars. Standing at the bottom looking up is terrifying. Often times you can't see the end, it's just a picture in your head. You hope you've chosen the right staircase, and the right shoes for that long climb ahead. First goes the right foot, and then the left. Step by step you climb higher and higher, soon you can't see the bottom and you still can't see the top. It gets hard, and you get tired. It's when you sit down in tears and the impossible really does seem just that. Impossible. When you reach that point of exhaustion; When you can't fight the voices in your head telling you, "you can't." When your support group leaves, and the day turns to night, you have to make a choice. You have to decide whether to get up, and keep going despite the tears streaming down your face and the bruises on your feet, or pull the I quit handle to your left, and slide down to the bottom of the staircase. You have to choose if giving up on everything, dealing with the I told your so's, and living with your what-if's and regret is easier... Or is that dream in your eyes worth everything you've already been through. That curious feeling that alights in your heart when you picture yourself at the top, smiling, and the pride you feel for yourself when you finally reach the impossible.

The choice is ultimately yours, and if it is important enough to you, there will be a window somewhere in that room of confusion. You just have to keep searching, and watching for the glimmer of glass, and a slight of air passing through the cracked window frame. Pull it open, and hop through. If you keep going, and trust in yourself, you'll find your staircase, you'll be able to start the climb, and you will make it to the top.

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